I was having a conversation with a couple of people recently about life & the different things it will throw at us. A friend is going through a change that seems to suck a little upfront. But in the long run, she is doing what is best for her and her family. In just a few short months she'll be better off. In trying to tell her that it was ok & it's a good decision, I threw out cancer. Then I apologized.
So I felt awkward.
The conversation went like this:
Her: So I'm dong this & it sucks a little now, but I'll be better off in 6 months
Me: It's ok. I can see myself in your shoes. Cancer. Blah, blah, blah. Cancer. Blartity, bloh, blah. Cancer.
Then I said it....... "I'm sorry. I sound like Debbie Downer when I mention cancer."
Thankfully, I was talking to people I love & they love me. They said the words that seem it ring out in my head: DO NOT APOLOGIZE FOR TALKING ABOUT THIS!!!
And they are right.
Bryce has officially had cancer for 3 years. The 3 year anniversary of his diagnosis is just around the corner. Talking about cancer for us is like asking someone else what they had for dinner or who won the world series (Congrats San Fran!!). It's my everyday. It's his very real reality. It's his body, his health and what is always on our minds.
But we are in a new place. I start talking and sure enough.... it happens...
Nice to meet you! I'm Jessica. We live down the street. Your kid is in my kids class. Cancer, cancer, blah, blah, blah. Cancer. Great! Maybe we can have you guys over sometime so the kids can play.
I should say that somewhere in there, I see their grief. or shock. or that glazed look when they don't know what to say. Immediately followed by the sound of crickets. One of the close friends I mentioned above told me that they think about us & pray for us, but they don't want to ask because they don't want to bring up an emotional topic. The strangers always say "I'm sorry." Then I do it too. Seriously..... someone tell me why I'm apologizing?!
I've decided that I'm not sorry. I'm allowed to talk about it. In fact, I WANT to talk about it. I want to answer your questions. I want to tell him how often I hear that prayers are being lifted up for him. It really is dinner conversation at Stobb Manor. Cancer isn't new news to us. And let's face it. I haven't ever had much of a filter anyways. IF you want to know, we'll tell ya!
And the thing of it is that this is normal life for us now. He's not so sick that he's bed ridden. His platelets rebounded VERY well in the last week. Therefore, we got the great big dose of the 3 drug cocktail on Tuesday. The next 2 weeks should be easy street with just the Cetuximab administration. He gets a little tired. Sometimes he is really cranky. But he's fine. He wakes up. He takes his meds. He makes his juice. He goes to work. He comes home. We do family stuff. Really normal from the outside looking in.
Of course, the impending doom for me is wondering if all of this is working. He has 3 days of appointments with MD Anderson the week before Thanksgiving. The final day is finding out if all that he's doing is working. Fingers crossed. In the meantime..... sorry. Not Sorry.
Wednesday, October 29, 2014
Wednesday, October 22, 2014
Back to Reality
It's Wednesday & this mom thinks she finally has it back together. Well, as together as I can be, anyways.
Let's see.... there was Disney. The boys & I had an amazing time. Bryce did what he could while suffering from some pretty rough chemo side effects. The good news is, our last day there, he started turning the corner. The meds that they gave him started kicking in as we were packing up to fly home. Which is great. He turned around the next day for more chemo. Then 2 days later, we flew out & headed for San Francisco with my bestie, Leslye & her super duper husband, Graham.
They had started talking to us this summer about taking a trip somewhere. A "screw cancer" trip. A "YAY! You're over it (again)" trip. When the bomb hit & we found out that cancer was still there, emotions were all over the place. They drove over for dinner that weekend & Graham said "We're doing this now." Pick your place. We bounced around some ideas. They all were centered around going to see a J. Roddy Walston & The Business show. This is Bryce's favorite band & the Swor family said "Yup.... let's do it." And San Fran is where we landed. I love that city. Love, love, LOVE that city!!! J. Roddy was fantastic. We saw Alcatraz from the inside & lots of other cool things. More importantly, we laughed. LOTS!
Austin to Florida to Austin to San Fran. We hit both of the coasts for family fun, then adult fun all in under 2 weeks. We got back Sunday night just in time to tuck our boys into bed & immediately went to bed ourselves. SO, it's Wednesday. I got the boys to school on time. No fussing, panicking or yelling about where a homework folder is. I think I have it together today.
It's just that Monday came around with the sinking feeling that Bryce has cancer. For some reason, it didn't go away while we were off making memories. For 2 weeks, cancer didn't exist. But we are back & Bryce immediately had to shave off his facial hair. It was falling out. So bye bye beard & mustache.
Did I tell you that we were able to get Bryce into Texas Oncology here in Austin for chemo? Yeah..... so no weekly drives to Houston for that. Yesterday, I got the boys off to school, maybe on time? Then back home to get myself ready to get him to chemo for the long haul. There was the 7 hour, 3 drug cocktail that was 3 weeks ago, then 2 weeks of just the 1 drug. So there we were, all packed up. He & I with our laptops in back packs. Then they tell us that his platelets are too low this week.
His face drops.
I can see it. He's upset.
Do you know what that does to a wife? It sucks. Know what sucks even more?
He had been extremely frustrating that morning. Just normal Bryce stuff. Those things that a husband knows how to do just to get the wife perfectly pissy. Then he realized that the day before I had taken care of some medication/pharmacy issues & he was nice again. So there I am. Do I stay pissy? How can I? He's being nice again. So it sucks to know that we were being buttholes for NO good reason before he gets this news.
But once I see the look of disappointment on his freshly shaven face, how can I be anything but.... sad? Sad at myself. Sad at his platelets. Sad at cancer. But I rub his arm & tell him it's all going to be ok. I remind myself that there's no crying when you're the strong one!!! I tell myself, "Self, you are going to HEB to buy all leafy dark veggies & fatty Omega-3 fish & whatever else the internet tells you to! You will NOT listen to the doctor when he says that we can't eat anything that will boost those platelets! You will do this!!! You will make Bryce eat those veggies. And he will LIKE IT!!!" and I did it all without crying.
So it's Wednesday. He's gone back to work. The boys are off to school. On the surface, this morning felt good. Now the house is quiet & needs my attention, but that sadness is sort of sneaking up on me. I don't have time for that. So.... fiddleddy dee. I'll think about it another day.
I'll leave you with pictures of some San Fran fun times.
Let's see.... there was Disney. The boys & I had an amazing time. Bryce did what he could while suffering from some pretty rough chemo side effects. The good news is, our last day there, he started turning the corner. The meds that they gave him started kicking in as we were packing up to fly home. Which is great. He turned around the next day for more chemo. Then 2 days later, we flew out & headed for San Francisco with my bestie, Leslye & her super duper husband, Graham.
They had started talking to us this summer about taking a trip somewhere. A "screw cancer" trip. A "YAY! You're over it (again)" trip. When the bomb hit & we found out that cancer was still there, emotions were all over the place. They drove over for dinner that weekend & Graham said "We're doing this now." Pick your place. We bounced around some ideas. They all were centered around going to see a J. Roddy Walston & The Business show. This is Bryce's favorite band & the Swor family said "Yup.... let's do it." And San Fran is where we landed. I love that city. Love, love, LOVE that city!!! J. Roddy was fantastic. We saw Alcatraz from the inside & lots of other cool things. More importantly, we laughed. LOTS!
Austin to Florida to Austin to San Fran. We hit both of the coasts for family fun, then adult fun all in under 2 weeks. We got back Sunday night just in time to tuck our boys into bed & immediately went to bed ourselves. SO, it's Wednesday. I got the boys to school on time. No fussing, panicking or yelling about where a homework folder is. I think I have it together today.
It's just that Monday came around with the sinking feeling that Bryce has cancer. For some reason, it didn't go away while we were off making memories. For 2 weeks, cancer didn't exist. But we are back & Bryce immediately had to shave off his facial hair. It was falling out. So bye bye beard & mustache.
Did I tell you that we were able to get Bryce into Texas Oncology here in Austin for chemo? Yeah..... so no weekly drives to Houston for that. Yesterday, I got the boys off to school, maybe on time? Then back home to get myself ready to get him to chemo for the long haul. There was the 7 hour, 3 drug cocktail that was 3 weeks ago, then 2 weeks of just the 1 drug. So there we were, all packed up. He & I with our laptops in back packs. Then they tell us that his platelets are too low this week.
His face drops.
I can see it. He's upset.
Do you know what that does to a wife? It sucks. Know what sucks even more?
He had been extremely frustrating that morning. Just normal Bryce stuff. Those things that a husband knows how to do just to get the wife perfectly pissy. Then he realized that the day before I had taken care of some medication/pharmacy issues & he was nice again. So there I am. Do I stay pissy? How can I? He's being nice again. So it sucks to know that we were being buttholes for NO good reason before he gets this news.
But once I see the look of disappointment on his freshly shaven face, how can I be anything but.... sad? Sad at myself. Sad at his platelets. Sad at cancer. But I rub his arm & tell him it's all going to be ok. I remind myself that there's no crying when you're the strong one!!! I tell myself, "Self, you are going to HEB to buy all leafy dark veggies & fatty Omega-3 fish & whatever else the internet tells you to! You will NOT listen to the doctor when he says that we can't eat anything that will boost those platelets! You will do this!!! You will make Bryce eat those veggies. And he will LIKE IT!!!" and I did it all without crying.
So it's Wednesday. He's gone back to work. The boys are off to school. On the surface, this morning felt good. Now the house is quiet & needs my attention, but that sadness is sort of sneaking up on me. I don't have time for that. So.... fiddleddy dee. I'll think about it another day.
I'll leave you with pictures of some San Fran fun times.
Tuesday, October 14, 2014
Whirlwind
We all get caught up in life and doing the everyday stuff that we have to do.
This past week, we did everything we're NOT supposed to do. And I had FUN!
I can't really remember what all was discussed since the last post. But here's what has been happening with Bryce.
He gets chemo on Tuesdays. Week 1 was a 3 drug cocktail. Week 2 was just cetuximab (chemo). And here I am on Tuesday for week 3. He's going to get cetuximab again this afternoon. He's scheduled it for late enough in the afternoon that I won't be able to go with him. I'll take that up with later. He IS experiencing side effects.
The cetuximab is serious stuff. In week 1, they actually just gave him a tiny bit in 10 minutes & he had to wait for 30 minutes to see if he was going to have a reaction to it or not. Luckily, he was fine & got the rest of it. However, one of the side effects is an "acne like rash" AH**bull$h!t**HEM
The rash is full blown acne. and it's painful. And he's getting sores in his mouth. His mouth & throat hurt so bad, it's tough for him to eat. He IS managing though. Managing as best as he can while his wife & kids pull him through Disney.
He really was a trooper!!!!! And we pulled the kids out of school for 2 days to have a family vacation. Mom called me up one day & said "We're sending you guys to Disney. now." Soooo..... Off we went!!! ~I know..... my parents are awesome~
When we were booking this trip, we still didn't know what was going on at MD Anderson. We didn't know that he was going to be full of chemo when we flew out of here. But it is what it is & we made the best of it. The boys had a blast!!!! This was their first experience at a theme park. The rides, the shows, the lines, the characters...... it was fun to see my boys having fun.
So..... I'm busy doing laundry & catching up on that everyday stuff that I get caught up in. And the boys had to go back to school. Therefore, it's REALLY quiet in this house & I'm loving that. So here's some pictures of us doing not everyday things. And the pre-trip lunch we had with said awesome parents.
This past week, we did everything we're NOT supposed to do. And I had FUN!
I can't really remember what all was discussed since the last post. But here's what has been happening with Bryce.
He gets chemo on Tuesdays. Week 1 was a 3 drug cocktail. Week 2 was just cetuximab (chemo). And here I am on Tuesday for week 3. He's going to get cetuximab again this afternoon. He's scheduled it for late enough in the afternoon that I won't be able to go with him. I'll take that up with later. He IS experiencing side effects.
The cetuximab is serious stuff. In week 1, they actually just gave him a tiny bit in 10 minutes & he had to wait for 30 minutes to see if he was going to have a reaction to it or not. Luckily, he was fine & got the rest of it. However, one of the side effects is an "acne like rash" AH**bull$h!t**HEM
The rash is full blown acne. and it's painful. And he's getting sores in his mouth. His mouth & throat hurt so bad, it's tough for him to eat. He IS managing though. Managing as best as he can while his wife & kids pull him through Disney.
He really was a trooper!!!!! And we pulled the kids out of school for 2 days to have a family vacation. Mom called me up one day & said "We're sending you guys to Disney. now." Soooo..... Off we went!!! ~I know..... my parents are awesome~
When we were booking this trip, we still didn't know what was going on at MD Anderson. We didn't know that he was going to be full of chemo when we flew out of here. But it is what it is & we made the best of it. The boys had a blast!!!! This was their first experience at a theme park. The rides, the shows, the lines, the characters...... it was fun to see my boys having fun.
So..... I'm busy doing laundry & catching up on that everyday stuff that I get caught up in. And the boys had to go back to school. Therefore, it's REALLY quiet in this house & I'm loving that. So here's some pictures of us doing not everyday things. And the pre-trip lunch we had with said awesome parents.
Saturday, October 4, 2014
Past, Present & Future
I feel like before I start randomly posting about Bryce's "condition" (that sounds weird). Let's just call it the cancer.
The Cancer.
with THE in the front unnecessarily. Like a retiree from Yonkers.
"He's gaht thah cancah"
I'm gonna try to cover 3 years in 3 minutes. Let's see if I can pull this off.
Dec. 2011 (just before Christmas) ~ He went to the general doctor because of a growth on his tongue. Dr says "WHOA! Go to this ENT guy STAT! Book the appointment saying you need a biopsy of that thing!"
Please note...... until he took my kids with him to this appointment while I was at work & the doctor was freaked out, I had never heard of a growth on his tongue.
Additionally, he doesn't smoke or dip. So why is it there?!
2 Days after Christmas 2011 ~ ENT does biopsy & says call me Thursday
Thursday Evening while driving to the lake house to see all of the family for New Years ~
Me: Did you call the Dr?
Him: No.
Me:......................
Friday he got the call & they told him that they needed him at the office to "break the news." I said OH NO YOU DON'T!!! Dr. called back & said "You have cancer"
So.... Squamous Cell Carcinoma is what he had. Has. It's a skin cancer that is also a head & neck cancer that is linked to HPV in young men. I'll get into that later.
Jan 2012 ~ Surgery to remove the tumor on his tongue & removed 100 lymph nodes in his neck. That's right folks...... he was cut ear to ear & they pulled them out. They tested everything. all lymph nodes are clear. So they're like.... Yeah man! You're good! No need for chemo & radiation!
May 2013 (returning from him being the best man in his BFF's wedding in Cayman Islands) ~
Him: Babe, book me an appointment with ENT guy again. Something is in my left neck.
June 2013 ~ Surgery to figure that out means removal of sub-mandibular gland, his left jugular & once that was gone they found a sack of 10 nodes where the cancer was.
Summer of 2013 ~ Mon-Fri radiation & Tuesday Chemo for 6.5 weeks
April 2014 ~ Gigantic noticeable growth coming out of nowhere lower center neck.
May 2014 ~ Surgery to remove his thyroid because the cancer was all over that! & the other tumor that had showed up behind his right clavicle. Other really difficult things require plastics to come in & pull his right pectoral muscle into his neck for "some meat" during radiation that he'll require & a skin graft.
Summer 2014 ~ More chemo & radiation for 6 weeks
Sept 2014 ~ We go in for the 6 weeks post treatment scans. Badda Bing. Badda Boom. He has more of the cancer. And that's where we stand. Again.... you can ALWAYS go get more from him at bastobb.blogspot.com
I more or less wanted to give others the grand scope of things before I really started to move into what's happening tomorrow & the next day. Tomorrow .... no wait...... actually today is my oldest birthday. He's ten. 10!!!!!!!!!! So here's a picture of my beautiful baby :)
The Cancer.
with THE in the front unnecessarily. Like a retiree from Yonkers.
"He's gaht thah cancah"
I'm gonna try to cover 3 years in 3 minutes. Let's see if I can pull this off.
Dec. 2011 (just before Christmas) ~ He went to the general doctor because of a growth on his tongue. Dr says "WHOA! Go to this ENT guy STAT! Book the appointment saying you need a biopsy of that thing!"
Please note...... until he took my kids with him to this appointment while I was at work & the doctor was freaked out, I had never heard of a growth on his tongue.
Additionally, he doesn't smoke or dip. So why is it there?!
2 Days after Christmas 2011 ~ ENT does biopsy & says call me Thursday
Thursday Evening while driving to the lake house to see all of the family for New Years ~
Me: Did you call the Dr?
Him: No.
Me:......................
Friday he got the call & they told him that they needed him at the office to "break the news." I said OH NO YOU DON'T!!! Dr. called back & said "You have cancer"
So.... Squamous Cell Carcinoma is what he had. Has. It's a skin cancer that is also a head & neck cancer that is linked to HPV in young men. I'll get into that later.
Jan 2012 ~ Surgery to remove the tumor on his tongue & removed 100 lymph nodes in his neck. That's right folks...... he was cut ear to ear & they pulled them out. They tested everything. all lymph nodes are clear. So they're like.... Yeah man! You're good! No need for chemo & radiation!
May 2013 (returning from him being the best man in his BFF's wedding in Cayman Islands) ~
Him: Babe, book me an appointment with ENT guy again. Something is in my left neck.
June 2013 ~ Surgery to figure that out means removal of sub-mandibular gland, his left jugular & once that was gone they found a sack of 10 nodes where the cancer was.
Summer of 2013 ~ Mon-Fri radiation & Tuesday Chemo for 6.5 weeks
April 2014 ~ Gigantic noticeable growth coming out of nowhere lower center neck.
May 2014 ~ Surgery to remove his thyroid because the cancer was all over that! & the other tumor that had showed up behind his right clavicle. Other really difficult things require plastics to come in & pull his right pectoral muscle into his neck for "some meat" during radiation that he'll require & a skin graft.
Summer 2014 ~ More chemo & radiation for 6 weeks
Sept 2014 ~ We go in for the 6 weeks post treatment scans. Badda Bing. Badda Boom. He has more of the cancer. And that's where we stand. Again.... you can ALWAYS go get more from him at bastobb.blogspot.com
I more or less wanted to give others the grand scope of things before I really started to move into what's happening tomorrow & the next day. Tomorrow .... no wait...... actually today is my oldest birthday. He's ten. 10!!!!!!!!!! So here's a picture of my beautiful baby :)
Wednesday, October 1, 2014
So this is happening.....
There's a part of me that thinks I should start at the beginning. But, which beginning?
There's a part of me that feels like I should tell people who I am. Then I decided that the only people that read this already know me. At least... sort of know me.
Maybe I'll start somewhere in the middle? I have things to get of my chest. I am pretty blunt, but also very caring and giving. Maybe I'll post recipes. But let's face it, The Pioneer Woman basically has cooking blog on lock. So let's start with things I have to get off my chest.
This is going to be the other side of the cancer story that the husband has been blogging about. If you haven't been reading or you're just finding out.... bastobb.blogspot.com
If you're offended by profanity, please refrain. If you like information, feelings from a guy that don't usually emote and really well written cancer blogs..... that's your guy. Luckily, he's my guy too.
People have been telling me that I'm so strong. His sister came up with the #BStrong idea to get people motivated behind him. Let's see...... from the beginning we've adopted a few others from other people we know too. We have an "army of prayer warriors." We stole that from the beautiful Julie who fought her battle with unmatched grace & faith. Her whole family did. Bryce & I love and cherish that family far more than I've probably ever told them (one of my many character flaws).
"Pray. Fight. Win" I stole that from a total stranger who reached out to me when he was eavesdropping on my conversation at a soccer game. I'm so grateful that he did. He additionally reminded me of Romans 12:12 ~ Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
There are probably many other stolen lines, thoughts, sentiments, etc. Truth be told BStrong started after the Boston marathon bombing. But when Kristina came up with it during a morning run, she didn't know that. Therefore, it has been adopted as our own. Everyone has been telling us to stay strong. Rely on our inner strength. I'll get into more of his cancer story another day (clue #1). This brings me back to where I was going....
Strength.
People keep telling me that I'm so strong. Honestly, I'm not. I don't feel strong. Not even a little bit. Ya know that flight or flight thing we all have? Do you know what happens when people have a propensity to be dramatic or "animated?" ok. I'll tell you. That fight or flight thing REALLY kicks in. I happen to be a big fan of flight. HeeeeYOUge fan actually. If I can't physically remove myself from things I don't want to deal with, then I'll just go to sleep. Literally. I will go to bed in order to NOT think about something. WHY?! Because once it's in my brain, I'm NOT sleeping. Insomnia is ugly, people. Just painful & ugly.
That's where Scarlett comes in. I've been "fiddledy dee"ing & "I'll think about it tomorrow"ing my whole way through this. Sure, I've occasionally faced a couple of blows & dealt with the punches with the grace of a 3 year old. But I really don't consider that strength. I mostly put the emotions off till tomorrow & just face the other stuff that has to get done. If denial is strength, then I've got this covered.
Scarlett O'Hara did it too!!!!!! So if she can do it, why can't I? She had a goal in mind. Some guy that never loved her & Tara. Sure..... she was a really crappy friend. Sure, she was spoiled & might have whined a little. She absolutely didn't know that what she needed was right in front of her (until he told her he didn't give a damn), but she had goals! She was getting back to Tara. Come hell or high water!!!!!
In summation...... that's what this blog is supposed to be about. This is my long winded way of saying that I'm going to attempt to face the news like a responsible adult. YES. Bryce has cancer. YES. I used to say "again" & need to just say "Still." And above all else.... He has to win this battle. I also need to have my own voice in the process. If for no other reason, I can stop telling him to blog the news. I'll just do it myself. BWAHHAHAA {Game on, Baby}
That's also not to say that you won't be subjected to random acts of stupid posts about whatever I feel like that day. Or pictures of my boys, because I think that they're amazingly beautiful. And probably the blog equivalent of retwittering a recipe that other people create. I'll try to keep it light. Funny & upbeat. But this is certainly going to be therapeutic. For me, anyways
#BStrong
Pray. Fight. Win.
Rom 12:12
There's a part of me that feels like I should tell people who I am. Then I decided that the only people that read this already know me. At least... sort of know me.
Maybe I'll start somewhere in the middle? I have things to get of my chest. I am pretty blunt, but also very caring and giving. Maybe I'll post recipes. But let's face it, The Pioneer Woman basically has cooking blog on lock. So let's start with things I have to get off my chest.
This is going to be the other side of the cancer story that the husband has been blogging about. If you haven't been reading or you're just finding out.... bastobb.blogspot.com
If you're offended by profanity, please refrain. If you like information, feelings from a guy that don't usually emote and really well written cancer blogs..... that's your guy. Luckily, he's my guy too.
People have been telling me that I'm so strong. His sister came up with the #BStrong idea to get people motivated behind him. Let's see...... from the beginning we've adopted a few others from other people we know too. We have an "army of prayer warriors." We stole that from the beautiful Julie who fought her battle with unmatched grace & faith. Her whole family did. Bryce & I love and cherish that family far more than I've probably ever told them (one of my many character flaws).
"Pray. Fight. Win" I stole that from a total stranger who reached out to me when he was eavesdropping on my conversation at a soccer game. I'm so grateful that he did. He additionally reminded me of Romans 12:12 ~ Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.
There are probably many other stolen lines, thoughts, sentiments, etc. Truth be told BStrong started after the Boston marathon bombing. But when Kristina came up with it during a morning run, she didn't know that. Therefore, it has been adopted as our own. Everyone has been telling us to stay strong. Rely on our inner strength. I'll get into more of his cancer story another day (clue #1). This brings me back to where I was going....
Strength.
People keep telling me that I'm so strong. Honestly, I'm not. I don't feel strong. Not even a little bit. Ya know that flight or flight thing we all have? Do you know what happens when people have a propensity to be dramatic or "animated?" ok. I'll tell you. That fight or flight thing REALLY kicks in. I happen to be a big fan of flight. HeeeeYOUge fan actually. If I can't physically remove myself from things I don't want to deal with, then I'll just go to sleep. Literally. I will go to bed in order to NOT think about something. WHY?! Because once it's in my brain, I'm NOT sleeping. Insomnia is ugly, people. Just painful & ugly.
That's where Scarlett comes in. I've been "fiddledy dee"ing & "I'll think about it tomorrow"ing my whole way through this. Sure, I've occasionally faced a couple of blows & dealt with the punches with the grace of a 3 year old. But I really don't consider that strength. I mostly put the emotions off till tomorrow & just face the other stuff that has to get done. If denial is strength, then I've got this covered.
Scarlett O'Hara did it too!!!!!! So if she can do it, why can't I? She had a goal in mind. Some guy that never loved her & Tara. Sure..... she was a really crappy friend. Sure, she was spoiled & might have whined a little. She absolutely didn't know that what she needed was right in front of her (until he told her he didn't give a damn), but she had goals! She was getting back to Tara. Come hell or high water!!!!!
In summation...... that's what this blog is supposed to be about. This is my long winded way of saying that I'm going to attempt to face the news like a responsible adult. YES. Bryce has cancer. YES. I used to say "again" & need to just say "Still." And above all else.... He has to win this battle. I also need to have my own voice in the process. If for no other reason, I can stop telling him to blog the news. I'll just do it myself. BWAHHAHAA {Game on, Baby}
That's also not to say that you won't be subjected to random acts of stupid posts about whatever I feel like that day. Or pictures of my boys, because I think that they're amazingly beautiful. And probably the blog equivalent of retwittering a recipe that other people create. I'll try to keep it light. Funny & upbeat. But this is certainly going to be therapeutic. For me, anyways
#BStrong
Pray. Fight. Win.
Rom 12:12
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